Making Friends is a Team Effort

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Soccer has expanded our circle of friends. 

For us, it’s been true that as we have aged, it has been tougher to make friends. It has also been true that we tend to become friends with the parents our children’s friends. This applies to soccer, too. 

Teammates become friends and team parents stick together, whether on the sidelines or in arranging carpools to and from practices. 

We didn’t see this as much on rec soccer, probably because that was one season per team. On travel soccer, however, the kids are together for the fall and spring seasons. That togetherness includes two or more practices a week and weekend games. 

The kids get close fast.

We like the kids. We followed Connor’s cues and playdate requests: The kids with whom he wanted to play were the parents we found ourselves pulled toward. Thus far, that pull has been spot-on. 

The adults have made solid friendships. In fact, some of the team dads and sons traveled to Washington, D.C., to see the Real Madrid-Juventus match in August. Most of them carpooled up and they shared rooms, hung out, hit the pool and basketball court, then toured White House area, where the kids ran into the Juventus team. They also met the Real bus driver. He let them sit on the team’s bus, took them for a ride and he came to their first home game. They made a lot of great memories.

Our midseason break is here. The fall season has ended, and our team of 20 split into two squads of 10 in the Adidas Clash tournament. They played each other in the consolation game. We saw two evenly matched teams of kids playing their hearts out. And all of the parents dreaded a win for either team. Team 1 led going into the half, then Team 2 scored twice, then a third time. Team 1 scored. Team 2 answered. It got to 5-5 in the final seconds. Team 2 had a free kick. It went in. But it was supposed to be an indirect kick, so it didn’t count. The game ended in a tie. The parents breathed a sigh of relief. All of the kids won that game. And all of the parents we spoke with talked about how much the team had improved over the previous year’s tournament and the fall season.

Making friends is a skill in our toolbox. However, as we grow up, it seems like that skill gets dull. Maybe we are so caught up in our own lives – work, bills, worries – that we forget to sharpen that tool. Our kids can help us. We learn by watching them, just as they learn by watching us.